My third daughter is a child of wonder. She is a fountain of vitality and youthful energy. She is the type of kid for whom it is more appropriate to say, instead of "she runs", rather "she skitters". But the thing I love the most about her is her sense of wonder - everything she hears is fascinating and marvelous. She wears her heart on her sleeve and makes these big facial expressions that make me smile every time I see them.
Case in point: The girls come with me on Saturday mornings when I go to train karate. The karate club is training right now at an inner city start-up church that meets in an old retail storefront on University Avenue in St. Paul. The building is in a state of half-repair and there are hazards galore for little girls to hurt themselves on. The girls always want to come with me and always discover, about five minutes after we get there, that watching dad do karate for 90 minutes is interminably boring. We bring backpacks full of crayons and books and snacks and dolls and you name it, but all of that buys us about a net of five minutes of pre-occupation. Then it is boredom. Unfortunately, the hardest part is that dad seems so busy with what he is doing and he doesn't seem to be paying very much attention to them.
At some point, it was realized that a surefire way to get dad's attention is to announce "potty, potty, potty" which is the emergency signal which means "I have waited too long and now I'm about to have an accident". Generally, we are pretty good about only saying this during real emergencies. But, at karate, and in particular when it is boring, the truth gets bent a little bit. On several occasions, I have jumped out of line in the karate class, swooped up a little girl with crossed legs, and bolted for the toilet at the end of the hall. And, on some of those occasions, stood there, waiting and cooling off and stiffening up, while they take their time on the potty and then tell me they don't have to pee. What's more, the bathroom has two doors, one from the hall, that we use, and one from a classroom on the other side where there is typically a bible study going on at the same time we are there for karate. Based on how clearly I can hear what the teacher in the bible study is saying, I extrapolate that they are probably clearly hearing all of our dialogue about wiping and pooping and peeing.
On one particular morning, I was in the bathroom with daughter #3. She really did have to go and she was particularly chatty. To redirect her attention and try to quiet her down I whispered "Suzie, we have to be quiet". Hearing me change my tone to a whisper, her eyes got big like she expected me to tell her a secret. "Why?" she whispered back, louder than she normally talks. "Because this is the Lord's house" I whispered. Her eyes got big. "This is the Lord's House?" she said, looking around. "Yes". The chatter died down a little bit. We finished up in the bathroom fairly quietly and I went back to training.
About 15 minutes later, I saw her, out of the corner of my eye, bee-lining full speed for the bathroom. Now, because of the hazards all around, this is a "no-no" - we always go to the bathroom with dad so dad knows where we are. I started chasing and calling after her "Suzie, wait up. Suzie, do you have to go potty? Wait for dad." etc. She got to the bathroom door, threw it full open so that the bible class would have clear reception and shouted back to me at the top of her lungs "DAD, I CAN'T WAIT! I HAVE TO TAKE A POOP IN THE LORD'S HOUSE!"
I'm not making it up.
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